Compulsions

First off, thanks for all the nice comments. I only wish I was that dedicated... I'd call it more of a compulsion really.

I think I fucked up. The night before last I had a net intake of 70 calories, and was not hungry whatsoever. Then I get on facebook, and for something stupid reason decide to look at my husband's ex-girlfriend's modeling pictures. Seeing that skinny girl's frame, and imagining how her hips must have felt compared to mine... I don't know how that made me feel. But I did find myself in the kitchen, heating up HALF a frozen pizza... which I ate in like five seconds flat. 400 calories, fuck. And did the legendary Jasmine go running like a good girl? No. She sat alone in the dark, crying and hating herself like a stupid lazy cow.

*Sigh* Yesterday was better (100 cal.) and I haven't gained any weight, so I guess I'll let this go for now, but I need to be better. I need to be strong, beautiful, and successful. All of that will happen as soon as I stop stuffing my fucking face. It's funny how a few moments of bad judgement will haunt me for days...

Penance will be mine. I know a couple other girls are fasting or planning fasts... well, I'm not eating until Saturday if you'd wish to join me. I'm also planning a strict diet and exercise plan so I don't fall off track once I deserve nourishment again.

Random fact: People at work have been assuming that I'm losing weight by using amphetamines. Let them think what they want ;)

Stay skinny girls, because we'll never be happy as fatties.

Edit: I just took my measurements, and in the last ten days I have:

• Lost 5 pounds
• Lost 1 inch on my waist
• Lost 1.5 inches at my navel
• Lost 1 inch on my hips
• Lost 1.5 inches on my thigh
• Lost 1.73% general body fat

:D